Farewell, Old Friend
This year I walked away from three long-standing friendships: two of five years and one of 18 years. One of them was like a big sister to me, so ending it with her had me in tears for months.
I didn't walk away out of anger or because I stopped loving them.
There were no conflicts.
No drama.
Just clarity, and unmet needs that had been communicated, with no change in behaviour.
I walked away because I finally love myself and could see I wasn't being treated the way I know I'm worthy of.
I used to chase love in both friendships and romance. It caused a lot of pain, and I refuse to put myself through that again.
After years of rebuilding my self-esteem and deciding what I won't tolerate, it became clear who could no longer stay in my life.
Guilt
Someone asked, "How do you deal with the guilt of walking away?"
I replied, "What do I have to feel guilty about?"
As someone who used to be a doormat and hate herself, I don't feel the slightest guilt about putting myself first. As a matter of fact, I'm proud of myself.
My choice to walk away is a testament to my healing and evolution.
Opening the Door for Alignment
When we say no to what no longer aligns, we make space for new, better things to enter our lives.
Once you understand that energy works like the algorithm, meaning whatever you interact with, more of that is sent your way, you learn to prioritise what and who you give your attention to.
I know that whatever I tolerate is equivalent to me saying, "I want more of this energy in my life."
This is why I no longer settle for half-assed things.
That's why I now have high standards and clear boundaries around who gets access to me.
It wasn't always that way, and it showed in the men I dated and the people I called friends: all proof that I had no self-respect.
Do Not Settle
If you're currently in an abusive or unsatisfactory friendship or relationship and you've been looking for a sign to leave, this is it, beloved.
Walk away.
Even if you love them and it hurts.
Even if you feel lonely and you fear you won't meet a new partner or friends.
Leave.
If you're in an abusive relationship and you're scared, share it with someone you trust and make a plan for how to leave safely.
You are worthy and deserving of the love that you desire and give.
You deserve reciprocal relationships.
You deserve to feel cherished.
With love,
Jazzlyn
